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“What’s perceived as authoritative in a man, becomes
aggressive in a woman,” says communications consultant Dr. Eve
Epstein. A stereotypical concept, never the less accurate. Dr.
Epstein and I have just sat down to tea in her study and before
we even get started it’s clear that she has a defined
perspective on the importance of communicating effectively in
business, as a woman.
“We are conditioned to have a need for
approval,” says Dr. Epstein. It’s a strong statement, but
she adds that whether in the boardroom, bedroom, or business, we
are often put in a place of “less than.” In
the world’s business arena women have made incredible inroads
into what was once defined as a “man’s world.” Still,
women make little more than 70 cents on the man’s income
dollar. While the gap may be lessening, often the female
business voice is looked upon as a whimper and not a roar. Being
taken seriously in the boardroom remains a challenge for some
women.
Dr. Epstein is a keen observer of the working verbal
relationship between men and women in the boardroom. Insisting
there are differences that may determine how seriously a woman
is taken in business, she has made it her mission to help women
take control of their business communication. As demonstrated by
her roster of clients, Dr. Epstein has clearly conquered both
the masculine and feminine worlds of effective communication.
She was the image consultant brought in to
aid the United Nations and Secretary General Kofi Annan create a
better public persona, the woman hired to educate and train
diplomats and prime ministers on the art of public and private
speaking. As a much sought after consultant for honing the
communication and sales skills of upper management, she has
graced the boardrooms of big business such as Estee Lauder Group
and Kraft Foods. Dr. Epstein, a Long Island resident, holds two
masters degrees from Columbia University and a Ph. D. in
rhetoric and communication from Temple University and has become
known as the “speech doctor to the rich and famous.”
But perhaps closest to her heart is her work with women,
including the National Association of Women Business Owners. She
is determined to help women effectively communicate in business.
“Women tend to end sentences or business
presentations on an up pitch. It is perceived as a lack of
authority and tentativeness,” says Epstein. She says men
often end sentences in a period and she believes it is more
effective. It is a statement as opposed to leaving an
open ended message. It’s just one example of how she says
women are conditioned socially while growing up, to sometimes
take a more submissive role, whether in a social setting or in
business.
She says, “A woman’s credibility is
often diminished by inappropriate inflection and other
characteristics,“ and adds that due to societal conditioning,
a lowered pitch is considered more credible because it is a key
difference between men and women in a business situation. “All
of a sudden when women present they fall into feminine
communication styles, which may be fine when dealing with women,
but not with men in business.”
For example bringing your inflection up
rather than down is a common mistake that women make. It’s not
natural, but is something Dr. Epstein says can be learned. “I
have women that make presentations and it’s a little trick and
they say they were never more effective.”
Also when reading, sometimes women tend to hesitate,
there may be a tentativeness Eve says, because we are
conditioned to seek approval.
A tool that is generally easier for women
is sustained eye contact. Eve suggests a twist on this
well-known edict of public speaking. She recommends continuous
eye contact for 10 to 15 seconds with each individual in the
room as you scan the area, making one point at a time. “This
way you are connecting with each person on an intimate level.”
Women can use their differences to their
advantage. “The whole key to successful living in general is
make your natural assets work for you instead of against you.”
Most women executives according to Dr. Epstein, are trained in
writing and not talking. So
while there may be valuable, well thought out information it may
orally present as a convoluted message. She suggests three
elements as the foundation for a public presentation: being
easily understood, audience centered and repetitive. “If you
have sound bites, you'll be a more effective communicator,”
adds Eve. Her underlying philosophy is that the audience can
only digest three key points and that often women tend to
over-prepare for presentation.
Finally the art of persuasion is fed by
effectively communicating and having control over your
environment, so keep in mind that body language will either
compliment or distract from the verbal presentation. It is
critical in this Information Age than ever before that we are
trained to be public speakers according to Eve. “The spoken
word is quantitatively and qualitatively different than the
written word.”
The ability to communicate verbally has now
become a prerequisite for success in a new economy. Internet
knowledge and computer savvy are paramount in our times, but Eve
says it has taken away from the spoken word to some degree. She
says there is a new organizational dynamic which has emerged
transforming our society into the Information Age. “It means
that in business those who will be successful will be the ones
that can adapt to high velocity change,” says Eve. Those who
do not adapt she adds, will become dinosaurs.
The new trend in business communication is
through the streaming of video and increased use of
teleconferencing. “Verbal communication skills have become the
new currency of the new business economy,” says Eve.
In other words, in order to keep ahead of the curve,
organizations need their managers not only to be computer
literate, but highly visible. Competition is keen and now top
managers will be expected to perform not only in the boardroom,
but also in front of a camera. “There is no substitute for
interpersonal communication,” adds Eve. So the need is greater
than ever before for women to address effective public
presentation skills in the business arena. More and more women
are moving into positions where they are expected to have
greater visibility. Dr. Epstein says, “We are not being hidden
in back rooms anymore, so it’s time to socialize ourselves to
be more effective in the boardroom.”
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